Tag Archives: animals

Animal charities at it like cats and dogs

This is one of the most dispiriting things I have read in a long time. I don’t begrudge animal charities, but neither do I deem them worthy of my hard-earned cash. The decision of the Scottish SPCA to launch this broadside suggests a complete lack of perspective. Is it really the case that people only give money to an animal charity in the clear understanding that the money will only be spent in a specific country? I’m having visions of the Chief Executive of the SSPCA pissing along Hadrian’s Wall to mark out his territory.

If the RSPCA have indeed been launching raiding parties over the border, then tut tut. Surely they are capable of resolving this cordially without engaging in megaphone diplomacy? All this highlights is that dubious value of having two seperate charities in the first place.

Fundamentally, if the animal charities can’t behave themselves, might I suggest you gift your money to something more deserving?

UPDATE: It would appear that the SSPCA have had run ins with other charities before.

I salute our new cetacean overlords

If they can learn this after a bit of time in captivity, imagine what might have happened if someone had inadvertantly told them about our system of commerce? With the credit crunch being what it is, they’d have control of the economy within weeks!

UPDATE: Okay, so not all cetaceans are clever. Geez! And to think these bozos are meant to save our asses in the future.

Pigs 1, Goths 0 (UPDATE)

The two most read articles on BBCi today give us a fascinating insight into where Britain’s collective head is at.

First of all we have the goth couple who have been banned from the bus because he insists on leading her on a lead. There are two issues here. First of all the bus company are surely only being responsible to ban them on health and safety grounds – the inherent dangers are quite obvious. Secondly, while what people do behind closed doors is fine by me, it is fascinating to compare this issue with the ongoing controversy over Muslim dress codes.

There is much public anxiety these days about Burqas (which I don’t see around anything like as much as I did a couple of years ago – anyone else notice this?) and other forms of Muslim dress. Would we have the same anxiety if like “Dani” and “Tasha” (guffaw!) they merely defined it as a form of sexual expression?

Is it really, as I fear some of my readers may accuse me, illiberal and prejudiced to suggest the two simply grow up, get a life and stop shoving their crass faux radicalism down our figurative throats? Where is the fine line between pointing out that people are making arses out of themselves and celebrating self-expression? Answers on a postcard (well, in the comments below) please.

Meanwhile, a retelling of the Three Little Pigs has been banned from a competition because it apparently is offensive to both Muslims and builders. In the case of the latter, I’m not sure if any retelling of the story can really avoid portraying them in a good light, unless the story is changed so that the houses made of straw and sticks end up meeting the latest tough EU building directives. I wonder if this sudden concern for the portrayal of the construction industry has anything to do with the current domination of Eastern Europeans of it in the UK? Should we all be talking it up with a view to establishing a new generation of eager young British labourers? Maybe studying Auf Weidersehen, Pet should be made compulsory on the national curriculum? Perhaps Bob the Builder should be monumented on the fourth plinth on Trafalgar Square?

But I digress. As I’ve blogged before, in what way are piggies offensive to Muslims? Just because I don’t eat horses, it doesn’t mean I think Black Beauty should be banned. I don’t seem to ever hear Muslims objecting to it either; only people claiming to speak “for” them. I think I need this carefully explained to me, preferably with diagrams, but apparently doing so would be “culturally insensitive” so I fear it won’t happen.

UPDATE: Okay, mea culpa. I’ve read a couple of alternative accounts of the goth incident and while my views on the couple themselves haven’t changed, my defence of the bus driver in question certainly was misplaced. Everyone has a right to get on a bus without being abused, verbally or physically.

Sadly, Tasha herself though doesn’t exactly come out of this well: “I am a pet, I generally act animal like and I lead a really easy life. I don’t cook or clean and I don’t go anywhere without Dani. It might seem strange but it makes us both happy. It’s my culture and my choice. It isn’t hurting anyone.” Sounds like low self-esteem to me. Since Mat wants to bark Mill at me, I will refer him to this. You really think I’m the one enslaving people by conformity?

If you thought Tony Blair’s cameo on the Simpsons was bad…

…check out his guest slot on George Bush’s dog Barney’s Christmas video in which he manages to not only look deferential to a miniature dog but even comes up with some excrutiating dialogue about how they’re both Scotties. I’m only comforted that they decided to cut to another scene before Blair got a chance to proffer his balls to Barney to lick. It’s for kids Tony – show some decency!

It’s one thing to be a poodle to a halfwit. It’s quite another to be a poodle to a halfwit’s poodle. Suddenly Gordon Brown doesn’t look quite so bad after all.

Is the media a ‘feral beast’? Science has the answer!

Tony Blair is lamenting about that eeevil old media. You know, the thing that he used to become Prime Minister:

the media can operate like “a feral beast” and its relationship with politicians is “damaged” and in need of repair.

Can this be true? Well, it would appear that we now have a way to find out. Simply stick one of these up a journo’s bum, et voila!

If the test is positive, the good news is you can use the bile they produce to make shampoo. How wonderful is that?

(I’d hat tip Chris Keating, but actually I read about it somewhere else first and thus he deserves no credit whatsoever)